Bah! Humbug!
Man, the Internet has been really lame recently. Something about this fat guy... in a red suit... and a beard. I dunno, I'm kind of perplexed. But I'm fighting back. With a VENGEANCE!
Don Diebel, who runs the website getgirls.com, claims that hand puppets (yes, hand puppets) will help guys "meet, attract and date tons of single women." The deal is, you find a cute girl at a club, put on the hand puppet, go up to her, and ask her to dance, using the hand puppet and a silly voice.
What happens? She'll "die laughing and think that you are so funny." Did I miss something? When did hand puppets become funny? I'm not a girl, but I would consider that pretty sketchy.
I wouldn't be caught dead trying something as stupid as that. Now... a life-size cardboard cutout of the governator? Comedy gold. "My friend, Arnold... he wants to dance with you, but... he's a little bit shy." And if it was a picture of him from his old Mr. Universe days? What girl could resist that?
(You have no idea how disappointed I am that no one is selling life-size cardboard cutouts of the governator online. Women would be crawling all over me. Damn Internet. WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME?! All I ask is for a life-size cardboard cutout of the governator. Is that too much to ask? *sniff* Is it getting a little dusty in here? I think I have something in my eye.)
In other news, American Express says that bookstores are the place to pick up singles in NYC. Could you somehow combine these two things? Could I try to pick up women in a bookstore with a hand puppet? Someone (not me) needs to test this.
Don Diebel, who runs the website getgirls.com, claims that hand puppets (yes, hand puppets) will help guys "meet, attract and date tons of single women." The deal is, you find a cute girl at a club, put on the hand puppet, go up to her, and ask her to dance, using the hand puppet and a silly voice.
What happens? She'll "die laughing and think that you are so funny." Did I miss something? When did hand puppets become funny? I'm not a girl, but I would consider that pretty sketchy.
I wouldn't be caught dead trying something as stupid as that. Now... a life-size cardboard cutout of the governator? Comedy gold. "My friend, Arnold... he wants to dance with you, but... he's a little bit shy." And if it was a picture of him from his old Mr. Universe days? What girl could resist that?
(You have no idea how disappointed I am that no one is selling life-size cardboard cutouts of the governator online. Women would be crawling all over me. Damn Internet. WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME?! All I ask is for a life-size cardboard cutout of the governator. Is that too much to ask? *sniff* Is it getting a little dusty in here? I think I have something in my eye.)
In other news, American Express says that bookstores are the place to pick up singles in NYC. Could you somehow combine these two things? Could I try to pick up women in a bookstore with a hand puppet? Someone (not me) needs to test this.
posted by Jeff at 7:47 PM
1 Comments:
dude, he could totally pick up women with a hand puppet. the question that really needs testing: could one of you pretend to be a ventriloquist dummy while the other one does all the talking? and if so, who would they go for?
taz
earthlikesky.com
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