Breaking News: Squirrels Decide The Election

A website modeled the presidential election using pumpkins. Uncannily accurate. Nader entered the race late. By the middle of the election, squirrels completely chewed off his face and he was quickly forgotten. Early on, Bush's ear was gnawed on by squirrels. This clearly foreshadowed the National Guard memos and the mysterious lump during the first debate. In the end, Bush was covered in white powder and was stepped on by a Fox News Cameraman. Kerry became fuzzy.

So it wasn't designed to model the election so much as it was designed to grow mold on pumpkins. But squirrels did gnaw Nader's face off.